Minutes

DBC Meeting # 14
March 14, 2006

Syberg's Restaurant & Grill
Maryland Heights, MO

Laura and Jen checked in at 7:10 with Jeannette in tow a few moments later. Mark W and She Who Must Not Be Named arrived by 7:23, but members were kept waiting until 8:55 for Matt. The meeting probably was called to order at some point, but there is no record of it, so its validity remains questionable.

Mgus and I am Teresa! who originally planned on attending were delayed by Marianne�s Ring Day ceremonies and consequently forgot to show up. It pains your seckitary to report that their lapse in good judgment set the tone for the entire evening and despite valiant efforts, the meeting was not what you would call �top drawer�. The high standards from which the Dodie & Bones Club was founded were not invoked, acknowledged or carried out. Mocking was held to a minimum, boisterous interruptions were few, and rudeness did not prevail. Still in all we were away from kids, homework and laundry and for that we were grateful.

Following is the inspirational message delivered at 9:56 p.m. by our very own Julie B:

"You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who makes people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea."

Thank you, Julie

Topics of Discussion:

• Manual Flush Techniques
• Julie wet her pants while jumping rope at SMMA
• There is a beautiful flower around Jeannette�s neck
• Mark W was a girl at 7:25
• Jen is making things into things
• Jen will be getting creamed tomorrow
• The 8th Sicking Sibling does not want to have her name mentioned in this month�s minutes
• There will be a going away party for Marcus & Elaine on Saturday 3/25 at the Steinbruegge�s residence
• Laura cannot attend said going away party for reasons unknown
• I�m a lumberjack and I�m okay, I leave all night and I leave all day

(As editor of these web-minutes I sometimes, like here, reach a quandary.  Should I jump in when I see a possible mistake in Mme. Seckitary's minutes, knowing that the proper lyrics, in this case,  are "I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay.  I sleep all night, and I work all day."  Or is it possible that the intent was to inject humor by including misquotes or a pastiche.  Or, perhaps even, Alane is poking fun at someone at the meeting who, sadly, did not know the correct lyrics to this famed ditty.  But, what the heck, I am editor so I ought to get to jump in every once in a while if I feel like it.  --Ed.)

(PS. When I sign these things "-- Ed." that stands for Editor which is the high falootin' name I give to my work as webmaster-doing-the-minutes-pages.  Please don't ask who "Ed" is.  There is no Ed.  It's just me.  -- Ed.)

• Indians are siding Matt & Jeannette�s house
• Tomorrow is national D-day in India and the Indians sent She Who Must Not Be Named an email notifying her of their holiday. They will have a bonfire and partake in many high jinxes during the celebration.

(I feel like jumping in here, too.  So I will.  Even though I have nothing of import to impart. -- Ed)

• It�s no good to be stoned in front of the microwave
• Jeannette came without Matt

(When was this?!!  -- Matt - I mean "Ed.")

(Oh.  My bad.  -- Ed.)

• Firefly Beach
• Delores and Mulva are Julie�s code names

(Yeah, like none of us have even seen Seinfeld. -- Ed.)

• Stories are unfolding and oh my goodness
• Mark W. thinks this is stupid
• Laura did not get lost too many times this month
• Mark, She Who Must Not Be Named and Nancy pretend to care about the stories being told
• Are all the Cardinals tickets already sold out for this year?
• Julie is perplexed
• Jeannette doesn�t know what Laura is suggesting and says, �What are you suggesting?�
• She Who Must Not Be Named doesn�t have any bangs
• Nancy�s hair looks quite nice this Tuesday evening
• Mark W. nods at the waitress

(I always thought that a waitress whose name was Matt could be called a "mattress". --Ed.)

• Julie says �hmmmm�
• I sit corrected
• For Lent, Jen will quit putting her hand in the toilet
• Julie�s kids like to put their hands in the toilet
• There are numerous French fries on Mark�s plate. Some might even say they are plentiful.
• Jeannette did not give up French fries for Lent.
• You have to shine a flashlight on pinworms to find them
• Julie and John have a 50/50 relationship
• Someone claims we are getting old
• Maybe we are getting old
• We checked, and no we�re still young and vibrant
• That is a relief
• Julie is slip sliding off her chair due to over-waxing
• She Who Must Not Be Named won�t let go of her label
• Jeannette doesn�t care for Dicks Sporting Good Store
• Matt is Mark W�s father
• Someone we know doesn�t like beans.
• Someone in St. Charles thinks Holy Trinity Parish is full of hosiers

(Editor's quandary here: Alane, I believe, meant to say "hoosiers" here.  But maybe she meant to say "hoser".  It's also remotely possible that she invented a nonce word "hosier"  to cleverly invoke both concepts in one utterance.  I'll assume the latter since it makes my little sister appear smart and creative.  --Ed.)

• Jeannette has a bubblegum mouth
• Jeannette is planning a DBC meeting at her house this summer
• Buffalo wing dip
• Grizzlies have a new doughnut burger for sale
• Apparently Marianne�s ring day ceremony is more important to Mark and Teresa than the DBC
• Matt is a Bocce Ball man
• It is so tense over there
• Bring portable microwave to Libby�s shower
• It�s gonna blow!!!
• Nancy has the queen of gel pens
• Nancy got kicked off jury duty
• Emily the waitress was smelling her pits
• The waitress is not very friendly
• Nancy thinks dot Indians are really gross
• Mark W. may be wrong about Ali & Emily
• Who is Ali?
• Me & Bobby McGee � Where has Matt gone?
• Matt tries to chair race again � no one joins in
• 10:00 meeting closed

The April meeting will be arranged by Elaine. Check website for date and location.

Your seckitary is tired of doing the minutes and wants someone else to take over. Will accept any offers

- Respectfully Submitted
this 29th day of March, 2006
Seckitary Alaine Inaz Sharkaway Macaroni

(Given all the flack I received last month regarding whether Alane had spelled a word incorrectly, and definitely not wishing to experience such chastisement again, I would like to hereby proclaim that Alane had absolute no misspellings or grammatical errors in her minutes text this month.  And when I say "absolutely no misspellings or grammatical errors" I mean that there was that thing about hoosier/hoser, and maybe six or seven others, but I'm way too much of a gentleman to even point them out.  Anyway, who's counting?-- Ed)